by Texas Homesteader ~
Have you ever had to go through possessions in a parent’s or grandparent’s home when they moved into a nursing home or passed away? It’s overwhelming! We had to do that recently. But valuable lessons were learned.
How do we spare our family from dealing with that immense burden when the time comes for them to go through our things? You’re gonna want to read this, y’all.
(Note: Some links in this post will take you to other related articles for further information. But links preceded with * are affiliate links. If you click and buy something I could receive a tiny commission.)
Overwhelming Flow Of Outdated Accumulations
When cleaning out my grandparent’s home I was faced with decades of excess accumulations. The task of sorting was overwhelming for myself & my siblings.
It required weeks of intense cleaning. We had to separate valuables, things of sentiment, old financial records and mountains of things to trash before we could even think about having an estate sale and finally listing the home for sale.
I’m sharing obstacles we encountered and solutions to consider instead so your family won’t be burdened when the time comes for them to go through your things.
How Long To Keep Old Tax Files?
We found several decades worth of old tax files. I used to think income tax files needed to be kept forever in case an audit was done or something. But according to H&R Block: (reference link below) For the most part tax files only need to be kept for 3-7 years, then can be discarded.
What to do instead: Each year as you file away your latest income tax report into the file cabinet, pull one that’s older than 7 years and dispose of it if appropriate. Take that opportunity to also eliminate old bank statements, paid bills, or any other financial document that you’re not required to keep longer.
Sensitive Information – Bank Stmts, Expired Credit Cards, etc.
We found bundles of outdated paperwork such as closed bank account statements, decades-old minor medical reports, pharmacy receipts, expired credit cards, etc,.
What to do instead: At the end of each year destroy old documents that are no longer needed such as utility bills, etc. If you’re unsure you can scan a copy to your computer for a short period of time instead of keeping the papers.
What To Keep: Consumer Reports (reference link below) states that your current wills, current real estate records, marriage license, divorce decrees, social security cards, military discharge papers, etc. should be safely kept.
Jewelry, Family Heirlooms, etc.
We found many family heirlooms, jewelry, etc. It was difficult figuring out how to distribute those things according to grandma’s wishes.
What to do instead: This is a big one, y’all. If you’re no longer wearing grandma’s brooch or using great grandma’s china, offer it to your family members now! Not only will your wishes be carried out but you’ll be able to enjoy watching THEM enjoy those things and have a little extra space in your home too!
Don’t be offended if items you consider precious are not viewed the same by your family members. Read my thoughts into Why Junior Might Not Want Family Heirlooms for a little insight.
So offer those things to your family, but let them be the guide into accepting your offer or not.
Old Untitled Family Photos
Our grandparents inherited boxes of old photos from their parents, then added their own photos over their lifetimes. Our parents inherited those photos from our grandparents then added their own as well over the years. Those same photos (plus MORE) will be passed down again and again.
We tried to identify as many old photos as we could but sadly there were tons of old unmarked photos that just could not be identified even by older family members. Boxes of untitled unidentifiable photos are of no use to anyone.
What to do instead:
Identify & Label Photos: Make sure to identify subjects on your photos by writing names & pertinent information on the backs. Even older photos you’ve inherited from past generations if possible.
Digitize and Name Photos: RancherMan & I digitized all our family photos. Grandchildren’s school photos, sports photos, special family events & vacations are all scanned with a description for each photo added with searchable information such as: MO/YR – Subject Name – Event. Those photos are backed up automatically to an external hard drive to keep them safe.
What To Do With Collectables
Grandma collected snow globes & Avon dishes. But she’d quit collecting years ago when those things crowded out their spaces on her shelves. Many she’d boxed and placed in a closet.
What to do instead: If you have collectables from decades ago and you no longer collect that item, don’t stuff it in a closet. Sell it & enjoy a few bucks from it. Your future heirs will thank you!
Cleaning Out Outdated Food
We all have food a little past the expiration date. And sometimes that’s ok. (See my post about Food Dating here for more information)
But in cleaning out our grandparent’s cabinets we found enough food that was a decade past the date to fill several large garbage bags!
What to do instead: Be sure to rotate your groceries, canned goods and freezer items periodically. As a bonus, food that remains will be easier to see and be consumed so it won’t go to waste.
Unknown & Unmarked Keys
We found piles of old house keys, car keys, lock keys, filing cabinet keys, etc. with no idea if they even went to anything grandma still had! It took days to go through it all and pair with current locks.
What to do instead: Engrave keys or add *Key Tags to identify all keys. When a padlock breaks or the door lock is changed, be sure to dispose of those associated keys.
Expired Prescriptions
Using outdated prescriptions can be dangerous. And having a box of old forgotten prescriptions is something our children will have to deal with later!
NOTE: DON’T FLUSH OLD PRESCRIPTIONS! This contaminates the water system.
What to do instead: Check for local locations offering a prescription take-back program. The police department in our county has a prescription collection box so old prescriptions could be properly and safely disposed.
Coffee Mugs, Plastic Food Containers, Dishes
Your kitchen cabinets may be overflowing. But how many coffee mugs, insulated tumblers, plastic food containers, etc. do you need?
What to do instead: Keep enough coffee mugs & such for yourself and your guests, but be realistic about how many you need. Your cabinets will be more spacious and easier to work with!
Outdoor Equipment, BBQ, Outdoor Decor, etc.
Grandpa hadn’t been able to use that charcoal grill for decades, but it sat in the yard rusting away all those years. That old grill had to be dealt with, as did the empty planters, old outdated chemicals, plastic disposable pots, etc.
What to do instead: Give away or sell outdoor equipment or landscape items you no longer use. Other gardeners will benefit & your garden shed will be more spacious!
Outdated Electronics
Do you have a box of old cell phones, charging cables for equipment you no longer own, outdated VHS players, etc.?
What to do instead: When you get a new cell phone be sure to sell your old cell phone on eBay. Donate or recycle older DVD players, printers, computers (after hard drive removed) & TVs when you get a new one. We found that Staples Office Supplies will recycle most old electronics & give you store credit to boot!
Clothes No Longer Worn
Do you have older clothes that you no longer wear, clothes that are ripped or stained or just don’t fit your current lifestyle all crammed tightly in your closet?
What to do instead: Do an annual closet clean-out. Sort into 3 categories: Keep – Donate – Trash/Rags.
Document Financial Accounts & Passwords
We had no idea what accounts grandma had without thumbing through decades old documents and trying to decipher it all.
What to do instead: Document those account numbers and passwords now! (You can read how RancherMan & I Document Information For Heirs Here)
Take Steps Now To Make Things Easier For Your Loved Ones
When a loved one passes or moves there are many emotions to deal with whether grief or worry. Add to that the uncertainty of dealing with the mountains of items in their home. It’s overwhelming.
So take steps now to make sure your own children or grandchildren don’t have the same immense burden to deal with. Tidy up your possessions now… for them!
~TxH~
Read More About Dealing With Loss:
- Documenting Accounts/Passwords
- Decluttering & STAYING Decluttered
- Memorial Tree Planting
- Sweet Remembrance Idea For Memorial
- Disposing of Confidential Documents Without A Shredder
- How To Show Love In A Time of Grief
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References:
H&R Block – How Long To Keep Tax Returns?
Consumer Reports – Documents To Keep Forever
Cleaning out the possessions of deceased family members has really encouraged me to be less of a hoarder. If it isn’t something I want, I let it go. That said,
1) Some financial records, such as purchase and sale of a house, and any improvements to the house, should be kept forever or until the estate is liquidated and probate closed.
2) Sometimes older people had a mistrust of banks. (Some younger people do too.) Go through every pocket, every purse, every drawer, every book. Carefully. You never know what you’ll find.
3) For the old family photos, don’t be quick to throw them away. I inherited several boxes of old photos, many from the 1800’s. Anyone who knew who they were was long gone. Until. I stumbled across a single family photo of the family patriarch and matriarch, along with their 4 children and spouses and the grandchildren born at the time. It. Was. Labeled. Suddenly, all of the mysterious family members were recognizable, and within a few hours, I had labeled 2/3 of the boxes. I also plugged them into a family tree, discovered my great-grandmother had pictures of distant cousins and even friends. I’ve been slowly tracking down their descendants and passing along those photos, which are very precious to the recipients.
Good tips on real estate and improvements. And good that you were able to update family tree information from old photos and also that you were finally able to label those old photos. I know they must be precious to you! I was able to send some of the untitled photos to a family member, hopefully they can do the same. But going forward it’s some important to label those photos! ~TxH~
Great article!!
Sooner or later we all have to go through our loved ones’ belongings. I kept hearing about others who were surprised at how difficult it is, which prompted me to write this piece, as we too were surprised at the sheer magnitude of it all. RancherMan & I are looking at our own belongings through a whole new lens and hoping to ease the stresses to our own children & grandchildren when the time comes for them to go through our things. The most important one IMO – when appropriate give family heirlooms to your loved ones now. ~TxH~